the smile

It all started with a smile a time or two ago, when it happened isn't important, the smile is all that is matters. Without that smile, they wouldn't be where they are today. She, wondering what it all means, he thinking just how much to share. Her, marveling at the words that seem to escape her through her fingers but nothing seems to make it further. Him watching her reaction, so scared and nervous to open up, knowing if he doesn't now, the chance may be lost forever.
There is a scared fear of the unknown in her eyes, she knows she isn't ready but his eyes plead with her to ignore her gut and trust him. She trusts, oh how she trusts and he just doesn't realize. Her heart aches for who she could be if things were different. She half looks, half makes light conversation all the while, she feels the warmth spreading from deep inside racing faster, burning like a fire trying to get out. Light laughter flows from her, she clears her throat hoping to cover the shock...he shares something so sacred with her. It was something created together, yet to see it as though he gave it a real life and gave it truth, she shivers in her own heat. He is so nervous, the red has crept further and she tries not to notice, to make light of their hearts flipping faster, His nervousness begins to show as he flips if only to do something with his hands other than touch her shoulder, hold her hand behind his back, give her the reassurance that only he seems to understand.
A break in the storm has put her feet back on level ground. She can focus, she can speak, she can think again through the gray of the lines in her mind. He moves through the motions of the break, has a quiet conversation while he watches her as she watches him.
He stands, will she come back to him...she moves closer and laughs but the smile is forced. He has no clue what she thinks, he worries, his smile is gentle and prodding, he pushes and she pushes back, not ready to confront the rush of emotions that completely consumes her. Words are difficult, she resorts back to the ease in which they first conversed but he wants nothing of the fake laughs and smiles.
He cares and she doesn't know how.